A decent night sleep and lasagna

                                                       
There is something to be said for friends who stand by you even when you are making a fool of yourself generating a tempest in a teapot.
Sam is like that. She was here for lasagna and to keep Rob's sister at bay.
The good news is Lisa got the message sort of, when I refused to drop what I had already told her I was doing(working) to go running off to meet with her.
Bit of a surprise when she saw Sam. Kept her and her dramatizations of her mother's crap off my face so I got a good night's sleep.
Got in a few pieces of trying to tell me what I needed to do and what Al needed to do and and and and and before she left but it just rolled off.
She sure does like to boss folks. But she has served me well. And she is gone, gone gone.
She knows she will not be coming back with any welcome from me. And I didn't raise my voice. No combat. No  Martian in the trenches.
But she has served me well.
Without her I would have committed a mortal sin against my soul, running out on Rob as he was dying, justifying it with refusing to put up with his verbal and psychological abuse.
I felt bad about doing that. Ans why not? Told him I was leaving and he had a heart attack that same night.Then I got the chance via Lisa to stay and be true to my own sense of honor.
You don't run out on a friend who is in trouble. You just don't and I almost went there.
And through all the anger at Lisa I found what was there for me.
I chose to put me on the back burner and give her what she needed. That she princessed out on the dirtiest physically nasty things that needed to be done is on her. I made a choice and I am responsible. That she betratyed my trust when I told her I would need help if I stayed is on her. She, like her mother beofer her doesn't know how to give. And that is also on her.
I made a choice and it was the right choice.
It gave me the key behind the curtain of Rob.
I really did love him, and I continued to in spite of all invitations to do otherwise.  I will always hold the best of him dear. The fact that he waited til Lisa was gone and was with me when he breathed his last is truly precious. Our last conversation was loud and clear on the life monitors as they rose whebn I talked to him and after I had said what I needed to say and he heard it all the readings dove and he was gone.

He wanted to talk to me before he left. He wanted  me to tell him that truth of what had happened and what Lisa had done.I am sure of that. So I told him and said I was sorry for sending him in the direction of his body when he came by the house confused that it wasn't there. I didn't know how bad it was. Good Old Lisa kept that to herself. And I told him there was not much chance of a life like he's had and that Lisa had taken that away. And I told him she pulled the plug because of her own pain because she, by her own admission couldn't face it. She ran away just like he told me she did when their parents died.

So Good bye and GOOD RIDDANCE, Mrs. Martin Raskin and your bossy coward of a daughter.
Too bad you had to make such a huge poisonous dent in the heart of your son.

Lucky for me she was gone before I met  Rob. I probably would be doing jail time for killing her if she wasn't already dead.

Man, did I luck out big time.

Ex Mea Manua In Tua Manua.