The Unforgiven

I admit 3:55 am is a bit of an odd hour out for most folks. But then I am a bit of an odd person out.

I had an amazing early morning yesterday. After the sadness of the last blog's entry I went on to a morning full of promise and fullfillment.

Then I did my taxes.

The reality of what I had done to myself financially bit down on my weak little legs of joy like a rabid dog intent on pure revenge.

Still I went on to accomplish all I had set myself to do and prepare to face a rather grim day of reckoning.

All I had done to myself in being there both for my late friend and his sister was shoot myself financially in the worst way.

Story of my life I felt. Always trying to help be decent and ending up on the short end of things. Rather bitter and self pitying some would say.

Tough.

It's the truth of how I felt by the end of the day. And this is a conversation with me.

Sleep came easy. Thanks Mr. Trivedi. One of the most noted effects of those energy healing transmissions is a decent night's sleep.

How precious that is, in fact.

Then this morning at 3:00 0r so I was awake with the oddest image in my mind...Clint Eastwood's "The Unforgiven"

Not all of it. Just the ending where this formerly "redeemed" whining, self abusive man, kowtowing to his dead wife's virtue in the face of his own "sins" was on a killing rampage.

But for whom did he go back to committing deadly sin?

His dead friend tortured to death by the villain and propped up as a public warning to the world of bounty hunters. For a woman slashed in her face and soul. A whore and herself part of the Unforgiven.

Fascinating image of his voice coming from the pitch dark after having served what was a very interesting Justice, warning all that he would return if his friend wasn't buried decently or any whores were further harmed.

He had redeemed himself through sin, not from it.

No one is forgiven who is not whole and good with their own past actions. With their true selves warts and all.

He was a gunslinger. In a world where violence ruled, why not?Only those spreading a false doctrine had issue with it and they, like the man's dead wife, were rotting, full of worms. False. A lie.

Fascinating to wake up to this on the night after a Trivedi blessing.

There has been a great wind roaring across my soul from this. It has been blowing the curtain back and forth across the keys.

Ex Mea Manua, In Tua Manua, Justica Dea.